[Pdx-pm] RFC: 1618i

Wed Apr 9 17:07:54 CDT 2003

Hopefully, this will be taken in the spirit it was intended :)

--

Portland Perl Mongers Group                                   Curtis "Ovid"
Poe
Request for Comments: 1618i
Updates:              Joshua
Category:             Standards Track                               April
2003

                      Telling Time : Generic Behavior

Status of this Memo

   This document specifies a Perl Mongers standards track protocol for the
   Portland Perl community, and requests discussion and suggestions for
   improvements.  Please refer to the current edition of the "PM Official
   Protocol Standards" (STD 1) for the standardization state and status of
this
   protocol.  Distribution of this memo is unlimited.

Copyright Notice

Abstract

   Joshua Keroes has demonstrated an inability to effectively communicate
time
   limitations to the members of Portland Perl Mongers.  After extensive
   research and a beer or two, we have come to the conclusion that Joshua
most
   likely owns an analog watch and cannot visually distinguish length of big
   hands and little hands (this might explain some other tall tales, but we
   digress).  This RFC is an attempt to circumvent this difficulty.

1. Introduction

   Analog watches have been the bane of humanity ever since a bunch of gears
   were tossed in a box, shaken, and the first analog watch emerged.  Those
who
   choose to wear analog watches frequently consider themselves "hip" and
would
   disdain the thought of wearing a digital watch.  However, when asked the
   time, those who wear the analog watches, when asked the time, look
decidely
   unhip whilst staring bleakly at the difficult to read watch and mutter,
"oh,
   it's a quarter past, um, three ... no ... four".  Contrast this to the
   responses exhibited by those who wear a digital watch:

   "It's four-thirteen, and seventeen seconds at ... mark!"

   While admittedly looking rather geeky, those who are bold enough to
   wear a digital watch are, in fact, more precise.

1.1  Overview of Joshua

   While it is not entirely certain that Joshua does, in fact, wear an
analog
   watch, we still conclude that he has difficulty telling time.  Rather
than
   giving him an extensive course in how to use the analog API and
potentially
   humiliate him, we recommend asking subtle questions such as "Joshua,
what's
   the big hand on?"

   By asking such questions, it is anticipated that Joshua will begin to
   realize that size does, in fact, matter, and that placement of hands can
   have a significant effect on future activities.

1.2 Modifications for Joshua

   Either buy a digital watch or learn the analog API.

2.  Full Copyright Statement

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   the copyright notice or references to Curtis "Ovid" Poe or other
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