[Pdx-pm] RFC: 1618i
cp at onsitetech.com
Wed Apr 9 17:07:54 CDT 2003
Hopefully, this will be taken in the spirit it was intended :)
Portland Perl Mongers Group Curtis "Ovid"
Request for Comments: 1618i
Category: Standards Track April
Telling Time : Generic Behavior
Status of this Memo
This document specifies a Perl Mongers standards track protocol for the
Portland Perl community, and requests discussion and suggestions for
improvements. Please refer to the current edition of the "PM Official
Protocol Standards" (STD 1) for the standardization state and status of
protocol. Distribution of this memo is unlimited.
Copyright (C) Curtis "Ovid" Poe (2003). All Rights Reserved.
Joshua Keroes has demonstrated an inability to effectively communicate
limitations to the members of Portland Perl Mongers. After extensive
research and a beer or two, we have come to the conclusion that Joshua
likely owns an analog watch and cannot visually distinguish length of big
hands and little hands (this might explain some other tall tales, but we
digress). This RFC is an attempt to circumvent this difficulty.
Analog watches have been the bane of humanity ever since a bunch of gears
were tossed in a box, shaken, and the first analog watch emerged. Those
choose to wear analog watches frequently consider themselves "hip" and
disdain the thought of wearing a digital watch. However, when asked the
time, those who wear the analog watches, when asked the time, look
unhip whilst staring bleakly at the difficult to read watch and mutter,
it's a quarter past, um, three ... no ... four". Contrast this to the
responses exhibited by those who wear a digital watch:
"It's four-thirteen, and seventeen seconds at ... mark!"
While admittedly looking rather geeky, those who are bold enough to
wear a digital watch are, in fact, more precise.
1.1 Overview of Joshua
While it is not entirely certain that Joshua does, in fact, wear an
watch, we still conclude that he has difficulty telling time. Rather
giving him an extensive course in how to use the analog API and
humiliate him, we recommend asking subtle questions such as "Joshua,
the big hand on?"
By asking such questions, it is anticipated that Joshua will begin to
realize that size does, in fact, matter, and that placement of hands can
have a significant effect on future activities.
1.2 Modifications for Joshua
Either buy a digital watch or learn the analog API.
2. Full Copyright Statement
Copyright (C) CURTIS "OVID" POE (1998). All Rights Reserved.
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